Our day, finally - March 20, 2005 - Part I

The day began funnily enough - with a 2am massage at the Shangri-la Hotel in Edsa because I couldn't sleep.

It was a strange thing, I couldn't sleep. I was nervous, anxious and had the same jittery feeling when I first got married. I only remembered it when I was going through the feelings - it struck me as silly. Why was I going through this? It's not like Brian could leave me waiting at the altar. I mean, he could but all that would mean is he and I meeting at some point of the day with me VERY angry. We're married - it's not like I should really feel so anxious...but I was.

I woke up the next day feeling quite alone - which was good. I think me alone in a room, preparing for a wedding day was good. It made me appreciate being alone, being on my own, by myself. I was able to write in my journal, do last minute itemizing for the day's schedule. have room service sent up of fruit and coffee and just relaxed. It helped re-emphasize the meaning of marriage for me - not just the fact that I will have a partner for the rest of my life, but even in that partnership and companionship, our own individual person exists. With my own wants, own decisions and ways of doing things. I enjoyed my time alone, but also started to realize, it was 10:00am!!!

My first supplier, Jeoff from Emphasis had a call time of 11am and I still had to transfer to the junior suite. There was a discussion with front desk about the next room and after several calls back and forth, the bellhops arrived to take my things from my room to the new suite. I texted the room number to Nenita, my coordinator and my day really begun.

First of all, let me get one ugly moment out of the way...you're familiar with the mother-daughter clashes that happen during these high tension moments? Well, my mom and I had ours that day too...just as they arrived at the suite. She started telling me there were mistakes on the table setting names and that the table arrangements were wrong. I was stressed, anxious and not really in the mood to deal with mistakes at that point and snapped, "You want to change it, do it yourself. In fact, do what you want to do."

That of course got her angry, and she walked out taking people she brought with her including my sister, my aunt, my daughter and the maid and driver. Ian, who was sleeping was the only one left with me. And so, for the rest of the morning until Jeoff arrived, it was just Ian and me watching tv.

What a great start to the day, don't you think? I called Brian, who was with his best man, and raged about it to him. After that, I felt better, he's great at calming me down. Jeoff arrived with the hairdresser and we began our wedding preparations...